Lyrakoさん(@Lyrako)のカレンダー・ブログ形式Twitter | meyou [ミーユー]

I really want to enjoy this manga, but after having watched so many experience with things including but not limited to anime and reading manga... At this point, I can only enjoy it's concept.

Thanks and goodnight.

I think I'll stick by closer to my IRL friends and not involve myself in multiple social platforms anymore. On my birthday, I've decided to reset and lose all my friends in the progress. I may lose thousands but to them, I am but a mere set of words that validate them.

"Words aren't valued anymore. Despite one of the only ways we can communicate to each other - whether that's spoken, written or texting - we'd all rather put on masks and pretend. It's always okay to be under the weather but we've don't admit it."

I'm not exactly suicidal, but I'm tired of living this way. Tired of keeping promises; tired of pandering to other people's emotions; tired of hearing them out. I'm not a therapist, I'm not your guideline and I'm not a counselor for my own problems.

Déjà vu, but I've been in this same loop for the past decade, listening to the same songs and albums during my midnight insomnia, hearing peoples problems that seem to just repeat endlessly and disgusted at myself whenever I look into that mirror.

As a consequence, I've started to hate reflective surfaces and any flaws that had reflected my personality. It's hypocritical and I hate it. I hate the person I've become, the words I deceive people with, and the affection I've promised people over the years.

I haven't taken a single step since I was twelve. I curse these days on Discord and my online life despite having the simplest of solutions: just uninstall. Even as I vent on this account, I see that spilling a word or two is so easy to make anyone happy; I hate it here.

By the time I realised, it was too late - or so I'd hope to say but there was definitely time left, I was just lazy. I didn't feel like leaving this comfort zone of what they'd categorise as simping. I sit here for God knows how many times I've been here, in this same situation.

I thought it was okay, I really did. But as time progressed, I started to understand that I was the common denominator in all my "tragic" stories. I always had to counsel and comfort those who asked for help and never had time for myself.

I've always thought about it: growing up in an environment surrounded by technology and the online world has really made me a dull person. I've never developed my relationship with my family and devoted all this time into being nice to people online for this sense of validation